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For the Week of Heart – Part 3

February 13, 2013

“There was another time in my life, before I met you…” – There Was Another Time in My Life – The Birds and the Bee Sides – Relient K

 

There was a time I wanted to lose myself in the lives of other women, thinking they’d make me better. If such a beautiful creature found me attractive and appealing, surely then I’d be worth something!

But it would inevitably fall apart. What happened? Invisible voices (now there’s a book title) told me it was my fault. I was doing well up until that point and “POOF!” I suddenly lost it.

And for the longest time I only really understood deepening love and affection in terms of how many articles of clothing I could manage to remove.

I’ve never just wanted sexual experiences, although once you taste that sweetest of sugar, well, it can be like when tigers or bears taste human blood – nothing else satisfies. That is, not without self-discipline and accountability to others.

It’s not just a chemical/biological reaction – “Luminous beings are we, not [just] this crude matter.

Sex is the melding of two bodies and the melding of two souls, two spirits. It is the most intimate possible act between two people; we are at our most physically vulnerable and our most emotionally or spiritually vulnerable.

That’s why they call it giving away a piece of your heart or soul.

Sex fuses together the hearts of those involved.

One night stands fuse them together then violently rips them apart. Those who claim it not to be so are in denial with hearts seared, spiritual nerve endings deadened. Yet they crave and pursue sex in a desperate search for that fleeting feeling of togetherness.

At that point it becomes a “fix.” That momentary jolt of feeling alive. Their sex partner is merely a smoked cigarette butt, discarded just as easily and casually without any thought.

The most beautiful and intimate expression of love then holds all the beauty of a cocaine addiction.

It is better to wait for marriage because it’s not just a commitment to fuck, it’s a commitment between two people to each other, to love each other with the decision that only death could keep you from flying into each other’s arms.

The idea is, if you truly love someone and he or she truly loves you, both of you will do whatever it takes to safeguard his penis and secure her vagina until your wedding night.

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

THE MUSE’S SONG OF EXECUTION: I Can’t Break Away – Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure – Big Pig

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